How To Stop Sabotaging Yourself This Year & Beyond

Sabotaging ourselves can happen on multiple levels. It can be something small like staying in bed for 10 extra minutes that causes us to rush to get out of the house and arrive late. It can be something large like denying ourselves the opportunities we have been longing for. In a previous post, Doing This Will Prevent Self-Sabotage, I talked about how we can prep ourselves before sabotaging has a chance to happen.

But what about when we reach new levels in life and business? How can we continue to handle the new level new concerns that pop up? Sometimes what worked previously won’t work currently. So, let’s take this up a notch and ascertain ways we can continue to keep self-sabotage at bay.

Remember how you got to where you’re at now.

You didn’t get this far by sheer luck. Give yourself some credit. It’s okay if people have helped you along the way but it’s still your doing that inspired people to help you. Use the “If-then” statement I discussed in my second book, How To Get To The Point In My Life. The “If-then” statement is a statement you use to remind you of your greatness and what you can continue to do, even if it’s new to you.

For example, you can say, “If I can raise children, then I can lead a team at work.” “If I can make it through 12 years of schooling, then I can choose to work at a job where there’s room for growth.” These are great reminders for when you’re looking to level up in life but need to give yourself a pep-talk.

How do you talk to yourself?

Self-talk matters. Are you conscious of your thoughts? Do you catch yourself when you think negatively and change your talk mid-thought? This is of the utmost importance. Self-sabotage has a lot to do with how you talk to yourself because you can talk yourself out of showing up to an event, following up with someone, or not trusting yourself. When you reach a new level in your career or in life, it’s important that you don’t down talk yourself and feel like you should be doing more in order to feel like you’re enough for that position. Of course, you are enough, see the first point in this list.

What are you consuming?

Who are you listening to and what are you watching? What you consume mentally is as crucial as what you consume physically, such as the food you eat and what you drink. What are you reading? Are you fact checking? What do you watch on your downtime? We are constantly consuming information which can easily be internalized if we aren’t careful. We can also be in constant reaction mode instead of processing mode based on what we consume. So, make sure that you are directing your attention to the beneficial material.

Focus on strength training.

Working out, stretching, moving, all of which are good to get the body at a strong level that also helps with posture. I feel invincible when I leave the gym. I feel so powerful and that feeling last for a while. I also like stretching because it helps me to be flexible physically which transfers over to being flexible when working on tasks and with people. The more I focus on honoring my body, the more I feel like I have the right to take up space and be present. Self-sabotaging can also take the form of asking ourselves “Do I have the right to be here.?” And, thinking about not wanting to take up too much space so we don’t expand aka don’t show our full talents.

Being nice to a fault.

You are doing yourself a disservice when you are overly nice, especially when it’s with the wrong people. It’s okay to be expressive. It’s okay to not have a good day. Trying to be nice all the time to everyone will not earn you respect. People have to see a combination of us being nice, having boundaries, and saying the word no. Being nice to a fault is instant self-sabotage that will get us nowhere quickly.

You don’t have to have it all at once.

Another assumption, besides being too nice, that is not in our favor is the belief that we have to have it all at once. Success can happen at any time and at any age. Don’t get me wrong, I’m am not the most patient person in the world, but I understand that trying to have it all at once and right now is another fast route to sabotaging myself. Why? Because this means that too much money, time, energy, and health is being spent. It means that I’m sending a needy I need it now or never vibe to the universe. It means that I’m less like to learn things in the process and probably won’t appreciate it. So, focus on gaining a few things at a time and as you hit your goals you can move on.