It’s so easy to sabotage ourselves that, at times, we don’t know when it’s happening because it shows up in a disguise that isn’t easily detected. For example, it’ll show up disguised as procrastination, perfectionism, overthinking, being overly cautious, distractions, or being sick (yes, we can make ourselves sick). When we sabotage ourselves, it’s really us having a deep concern for putting ourselves out there 100% and I totally get it. In a world where people are internet gangsters, it can be scary to put ourselves out there on social media and other places where we are in our zone, displaying our talents unapologetically for the world to see.
However, there are other times where we gave something or someone our all and it didn’t pan out the way we imagined it in our minds. The result is that we have doubts about our abilities and this leads to another form of self-sabotage. It could take months or years before we decided to get over our self-doubts. Let’s explore ways to cut down on the lead time of getting our groove back and prevent self-sabotage. In other words, let’s unlock your personal magic!
REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE
You are an amazing divine being who is capable of accomplishing many great things by yourself and with a group of people. Don’t shortchange yourself. Think about how you define yourself. This will help you to recenter when you’re in a funk. No one gets to tell you who you are. You have to define yourself and own every nook and cranny of yourself. It’s also not your concern to worry about how someone will feel when you become wildly successful. Why forfeit being successful because some negative person will feel bad about their life? Continue to focus on living unapologetically, you will find the true blue you, and allow yourself to thrive!
REMEMBER WHERE YOUR POWER REALLY COMES FROM
When you think of power, what comes to mind? For most people, money is synonymous with power and I get it. Lots of doors open up to you when you’re financially healthy. However, that’s not where you’re power lies. Your source power and strength will always come from within. If you try to chase some external thing to feel capable again or if you give your power away for someone else to handle for you, then you lose. There’s more than one way to solve a problem so don’t think that you’re powerless when you really just have to look within to remember your power source. Meditate, write, and spend some time alone to get back in touch with your power. Once that’s done, you will be able to use your power to get you to where you want to be in life.
WHO ARE YOUR TOP 5?
Who are the top 5 people you hang around the most? It may sound like a cliche but you are the average of the 5 people who you hang around the most. We morph into versions of the people who we spend the most time with, it never fails. If you are hanging around constantly negative and hateful people, then you will either feel zapped of energy or you will become a bitter person unless you leave them alone. If your top 5 isn’t encouraging you to do better, calling you out when you’re messing up, or supporting you through hard times, then why are they there? You are sabotaging yourself if you are keeping negative people around because they are your childhood friends. So what?! Let’s let go of the false sense of loyalty and embrace our bright future without them. Letting go of negative people also applies to people who are lazy. These are the people who talk about what they are going to do but nothing concrete happens. They have plans but a majority of their day is wasted with little or no productivity. It’s okay to let go.
STRATEGY
Without a strategy and checkpoints, we’ll forget our accomplishments and how far we are in our journey. Remember what I mentioned earlier about something not panning out the way we want it to and that leading towards self-doubt? Well, here’s a solution for that thought process. When you write down your strategies, you will see how far you have come along in your journey aka growth factor. You will also see that what you have done before you can do again. How’s that for a booster and reminder of what you are capable of?! Remember, when things are written down, it’s more real. Reflect on what you have accomplished. Feel that energy and use it to your benefit!
TIME OFF
Everyone needs to recharge. Whether you take a mental day or go on a long vacation, making space to disconnect so you can come back bigger, badder, and bolder is for your highest good. There’s no need to feel guilty or think that taking care of self is expensive. You can spend your mental day at home relaxing aka free. You can walk through a park aka free. Okay, maybe you’ll want a latte as you walk through the park. Lol, The point is that taking that time off will get you off the hamster wheel and allow you to take a few steps back to see where you may need to be flexible, tweak something, or let something go.
STAY IN YOUR LANE
Social media is the new keeping up with the Joneses. Loads of people feel inadequate when they see things like an influencer with a 100k following, that perfect couple who’s always on vacation, or the woman who seriously never takes a bad picture. When we focus hardcore on other people’s lives, we forget about our own. What some people forget is that everyone is going through something. Nothing that’s grand is accomplished with ease. We only see the highlight reel of a person’s life. What is working for them may not work for you, and that’s okay. It’s also okay to be inspired by people but they are living their lives. It’s of the utmost importance for you to find your vibe and voice and let that flourish.
This is such a good read! I didn’t realize some of the stuff I’m doing is me self-sabotaging myself. Like always giving up on diets because I haven’t seen results in the past so what’s the point of doing it now type stuff. Thanks for this post girl!
Thank you! I’m glad to have helped you in that department! ♥️♥️
I really needed this, this morning. I have been self-sabotaging myself for as long as I can remember and just recently realized I was doing it. This morning I was feeling really guilty about taking a week away from blogging but your post just put my mind at ease. Hearing that its okay to take a break from someone else is so refreshing. I am ready to tackle my self-sabotage head on now, thanks to you Queen!!!!
You’re most welcome fellow Queen! I love that you’re about to tackle this and all that jazz!
Such a real and great post. I’ve definitely sabotaged myself by over working and doubting myself. One thing I do that you listed is writing things done it really does help and let you look back.
Writing has been a game changer for me. I know it will be for you. ♥️♥️